
Depression tells us many lies.
It tells us we are unloved, unwanted, unskilled, different from everyone else - it tells lies we believe all too easily. And one of the most insidious lies it tells us is that “nothing will ever get better. Nothing is going to change."
I’ve heard those lies myself, and I’ve believed them. I’ve been in that dark place where it feels like there’s no point in doing anything, trying anything, there’s simply no point. Nothing will ever get any better.
But it is a lie; and our bodies offer us four chemical tools that we can use to our advantage, and help deliver positive change. So today, here’s a simple set of tips on hacking your body chemistry to deliver real change, real fast.
1: Take away some pain (Endorphins soothe and settle)
This is the bodies own version of morphine, a natural painkiller. Depression, stress and anxiety all cause us pain, both physical and mental; and whilst we’re in pain, it can be hard to take further action towards feeling better. So, step 1 is to act to reduce the pain.
Some simple options to generate natural endorphins are:
Have a laugh Laughter really is the best medicine, it generates those endorphins we need. Watch a good comedian, scroll through funnies on TickTock, whatever tickles your funny bone.
Go for a walk One of the first changes I recommend to my clients is to start integrating a daily walk into their routine. Of course the more you exercise the better, but regular exercise is hard when you’re living down in the dark valley. So a walk is a great step - especially if you can walk near moving water (science has proved this helps more than anything else).
Watch a movie Falling into a fantasy world and story can generate endorphins, as it removes us from our lives and gives us respite, much as that walk along the shore can do. Pick movies that you enjoy, particularly if they have happier, more enjoyable outcomes. I will share that my favourite movie is The Wizard of Oz. I’m not saying it’s the best movie ever made, but it’s a movie that I found hits certain emotional notes for me that really help. I love the outcome, the story and the songs, and it lifts me every time I watch it - producing those endorphins I need.
Play a game Much like a movie, games can immerse us in dream worlds and take us away from what’s painful. You don’t want to avoid the real world for too long, but playing a game you enjoy for a short while can help to generate those endorphins and provide some relief from our pain. It can be particularly helpful if that game provides freedom from the limitations of life - letting you fly, for example.
2: Reward yourself (Dopamine is the reward chemical)
Now that you’re feeling less pain, it’s time to reward yourself - and dopamine is the way to do it. Our brains have a built-in reward chemical, which makes us feel better when we do good things.
So how do you give yourself that reward?
Tick something off a list Getting something done gives us a little boost, via dopamine - that’s why it’s so rewarding to tick items of a ToDo list. So, write up that ToDo list! It doesn’t need to have huge items on there, keep it simple; ‘Go for a walk today’ gives you both the endorphins from the walk itself and the dopamine from ticking off the item on your list. ‘Drink plenty of water today’ is a great health step, and doesn’t take any real effort. It’s an easy item to put on that list, and tick off each day.
Eat something you enjoy (that’s not too ‘junky’) There’s a reason that bad foods make us feel good in the moment, but that’s usually a very short-term boost. Normally our guilt and the negative effects of the food itself will reduce the benefit we see from eating sugary or fatty snacks. The opposite is true when we find something we enjoy that is less unhealthy, or even good for us. For me, I love my pickled onions - they aren’t a health food, but that crunch and vinegary bite really give me a moment of enjoyment. Find something you enjoy, that won’t leave you feeling guilty afterwards. For me that always includes the option of buying a great cup of coffee, and stopping long enough to really savour it.
Do something to take care of yourself There are plenty of ways we can take care of ourselves that can feel good, and trigger that dopamine. Going for a haircut is one of my favourites, but having a good shower, slapping a facial cleansing mask on, going for a massage or getting your nails done can all help. It can be hard to convince yourself to do something nice for yourself at times like this, but when you do, it can really drive that reward chemical.
3: Feel some love (Oxytocin leaves us 'loved-up')
This is the chemical that is often called the love hormone. Your body creates oxytocin in response to social interactions, connecting to other humans in ways from friendship through to love and sex. It helps us bond, and be happy.
Crucially, it is a feedback hormone - the more you create it, the more your body stimulates the use and creation of it. Get the ball rolling, and your body helps itself.
Simple ways to start generating oxytocin:
Help someone Helping people makes us feel connected, which in turn stimulates oxytocin. You can do this in so many ways; drop some items you no longer need into an op-shop, drop a few coins in the hand of someone in need, even just holding the door for someone entering a store can do it. And it doesn’t have to stop there, sign up for a charity run, buy some food and drop it to a person in need, there’s so many options here. Today I’m donating blood, something all of us should do if we can, and it’s immensely rewarding to be able to help others (being a touch selfish as we do it, since it generates that oxytocin!)
Cuddle an animal Animals are the best - we all know that. Cuddling a dog, petting a cat, chatting to a bird or bunny, any interactions with animals helps us to feel connected and can generate oxytocin. If you don’t have a pet, stop and pet dogs in the park, visit your local zoo, animal park or even pet store. Combine points one and two, and offer to walk or feed the pet of someone in the street who’s struggling to get their pet taken care of.
Read something positive about people Social media and the web are stuffed with content, both good and bad, about the world and the people in it - look hard and you’ll find plenty of content that talks about the kind and the caring. Reading about how kind people can be, how caring they can be to each other, can help us to feel some of that for ourselves, and generate that oxytocin.
Be social This can be hard when you’re feeling depressed or lost in anxiety, but actually reaching out to others and being social, even for a little while, can absolutely help us to generate that love hormone. Reaching out to friends or family for a visit can be amazingly helpful, when you feel that connection to them. You don’t need to share how you’re feeling if you don’t want to, just spending time with them, and feeling that they want you there, can help.
Have a hug Possibly the hardest one of all, when you are down that hole in the dark - but if it’s possible, human touch and connection is powerful medecine at a time like this. If you have someone you can reach out to at this time, then do - you don’t even need to talk, just let them know you need a hug, rock up and give in to a short cuddle. Partners and children are great for this, so don’t cut off your best chance at feeling better - hug, hug, and hug again.
4: Stay happy (Serotonin stabilises our mood)
Final step, now that you’ve reduce your pain, triggered your reward centre and felt a little love, it’s time to stabilise this ‘new normal’. This is where serotonin comes in. Whilst this chemical does several things, one of the roles it plays is to help stabilise our mood and how we feel.
So, how can we trigger our bodies to produce serotonin?
Be mindful and/or meditate Mindfulness is a simple technique that helps us focus on the present. Focussing on the past tends to lead us towards depression (since we can't change it), focussing on the future tends to lead us towards anxiety (since we don't know what'll happen yet). Focussing on the moment let's us just be where we are, and soak up all the happiness that the world has to offer. Meditation clears us of the worries that plague us, stops those voices of doubt and depression, and takes a weight off our shoulders. Both of these methods are simple and easy to learn, and both generate serotonin and help stabilise how we feel.
Visit with nature (especially the 'wet' kind) Spending any time with nature helps us to feel more connected to the world and puts our troubles a little more in perspective. As I outlined above, spending time near the sea, lakes or rivers has the added bonus of boosting our mood even more than grass, plants and forests do - but any time with nature helps to boost that serotonin.
Get out into the sun This one is an easy one. You've probably covered this one several times already, if you're exercising, helping someone or spending some time in nature. Get into the sun and out of your head, out into the garden or down the road to a park. Walk on the beach. If you can't get out of the house, then open the curtains, stand in the direct sunlight and bask in it like a lizard. Soak it up. Of course you need to think about skin exposure, but the point is, get out and get that serotonin into production!
Start the chemicals pumping
You might have read this and thought to yourself "geez, that's a lot to do!"
But really, there are some simple options here that get these chemicals working for you, rather than staying where you are. Eating good healthy food with some small reward treats, and going for a healthy walk in the sun every day, and you're most of the way there.
And, as with all efforts with our mental health, take it one step at a time. Small actions can have a big impact.
Hopefully this helped. And if not - contact me. I'm always here to help. For now, take care of yourselves, and each other.

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